Repeat this statement as many times as you can!
For someone who suffers from anxiety, happiness is always a test, rather than a privilege of joy. You’re always waiting for the other shoe to drop, for something to justify your worst fears. And it’s not like you’re taking a pessimistic view of happiness. You would like nothing more than to be happy and lighthearted, knowing that you’re living the best life.
But perhaps it’s because of your past experiences, that you keep thinking that it’s all too good to be true.
However, this is when you must pay attention to what is being told; happiness is not a test. Moments of happiness and love are something that you deserve. They will not be taken from you; neither will they bring about anything worse.
Every person who goes through some hardships in their life will have happiness again. And just because you have your happy moments now, will not mean that you’ll have hardships again. This is not a cycle.
But How Do I Know it’s good?
Being uncertain and being afraid of that uncertainty is a natural reaction, something for which you’re completely justified. However, this fear can sometimes ruin things if you’re not careful.
Fear of the unknown often forces us to push further into the dark abyss of our depression, and that brings about anxiety and anxiety attacks. However, if you want to have self-control, you must recognize where your fear ends and common sense begins.
Let’s take an example of someone beginning a new job. As a person who suffers from anxiety, you might wonder whether you’re doing something right, anything right. You’ll fear even the smallest changes or critique in your work, and you’ll always be on tenterhooks whenever someone approaches you. That is your fear.
Common sense would make you understand the scenario, the necessity of the critique or feedback. However, since your fear will have overtaken you, you’ll end up ignoring the necessity of that critique or response, and you’ll respond in the worst way possible.
That is when a good situation will turn bad, when a moment of happiness and understanding would bring about negative results. And because you’d be blinded by your own fear, you’d think that your anxiety was justified, that you were right to doubt that moment of happiness. But the truth is; your anxiety ruined it.
Victim Blaming and Understanding
Keep in mind that this isn’t victim blaming.
Yes, your actions bring about negativity because your anxiety makes you see the worst in everything. But at the end of the day, there is no real villain in this. Your past experiences made you like this, and it’s not your fault if you feel this way.
But what you can do is find a way to bring yourself out of it, even a little. No one can get over their anxiety. That is a hurtful phrase spoken by the ignorant. You can however, push your anxiety back. Live through it, but not let it guide your thoughts and actions. Discipline yourself against stress and get out of the comfort zone your anxiety has pushed you in.
That is the only way you can live a life of true happiness, one you so richly deserve.